I began my Abramelin operation on 21.09.2015 and am currently in the third week. I have been preparing for it since I was seventeen. It feels absolutely great to finally do it.
The first couple of weeks were preparatory, fine tuning the process. I ran into issues with my oil lamp. I attempted to make my own one but after a week of using it I abandoned it. I could not get it to burn consistently. One morning I was in my meditation (eyes closed) to become slowly increasingly aware of a stench filling in the room. The wick went out and was smouldering. My HGA (Holy Guardian Angel) spoke to me with a certain amusement ‘you are feeling burned out’.
I am waiting for a delivery of a wick to fit into my old oil lamp I used during ‘Liber Astarte’. Meanwhile my HGA instructed me on how to proceed. From reading the Book of Abramelin and other peoples accounts I figured my life will continue more or less as usual (to begin with). However Axan (Name of my Angel kindly permitted to be shared) had something else in mind. Not one day of my life went according to my plan. I was given simple but concrete instructions to follow which pretty much filled up my days.
Some might ask since I already know my HGA’s name and can converse with them, why do I bother doing Abramelin? I have long suspected that Axan is my HGA but wanted a formal, ritualistic confirmation of this. My main reason for doing Abramelin is to tune myself in properly. I do not like Axan just popping in and out randomly. I want to establish a strong and durable relationship that will help me progress in magick.
After two and a half weeks I already see an amazing results from this work. Tuning in twice a day seems enough to address three very important issues in my life. The first one regards my obsession with making plans (which as I mentioned went out the window straight away). I never realised that being tied to tight schedule of my own making was creating so much stress. Nice to let go of it.
Second issue dealt with assertiveness and letting go of a sense of guilt in my family relationships. I was working on this one for a while now. I was able to place boundaries with my relatives before the operation but I still had a sense of guilt associated with it. It seems for now that its gone. Time will show of course.
The last big thing that changed regards my listening and communication skills. Again, I have been working on this intensely, especially over the last year. Doing Abramelin and having Axan advising and encouraging me does wonders to my confidence and with this comes much stronger control over emotions.
To sum up I definitely had a chance to ruin this operation in its first weeks and I managed to see through it. I credit principles of flexibility, humor and patience for my initial success.
I intend to write regular updates and share insights in the spirit of Free and Scientific Illuminism. Axan fully endorses this idea and sends a beam of light to all of you my fellow Agents!